The Down Range Forum

Member Section => Down Range Cafe => Topic started by: philw on March 15, 2011, 05:48:18 PM

Title: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: philw on March 15, 2011, 05:48:18 PM
 ;D ;D ;D

http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: twyacht on March 15, 2011, 07:41:26 PM
I believe he was one of our historically "better' trolls,....here in the archives....

Good to see he still loves living at Momma's and posting from his basement..... ::)

(http://i133.photobucket.com/albums/q78/mightyix/Random%20Junk/MallNinjajpg.jpg)

(http://i296.photobucket.com/albums/mm182/twyacht/paul_blart_mall_ninja.jpg)

 ;D
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: mkm on March 15, 2011, 07:45:42 PM
There's a whole lot of reading at the link, but it's hilarious up to the point where I am now.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Ichiban on March 15, 2011, 08:11:46 PM
Truly an internet icon.  I followed him for awhile and never figured out if he was truly delusional or just jerking everyones chain.  Funny stuff either way.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Pecos Bill on March 15, 2011, 08:27:23 PM
This is some form of Ausie humor, right? I've met some STRANGE people while working retail but nobody but nobody like that.

Pecos
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: twyacht on March 15, 2011, 08:33:45 PM
This is some form of Ausie humor, right? I've met some STRANGE people while working retail but nobody but nobody like that.

Pecos

Really, he "was here" at DRTV, graced us with his presence he did.....Upon post number 3, he completely set us straight on carrying MP5's, dealing with an unruly consumer, and how dangerous mall parking lots are...

I liked the suppressed HK45.. Especially those vagabond teenage girls coming out of Macy's.....


Truly a legend in his own mind,.... ;D
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: JC5123 on March 16, 2011, 09:08:07 AM
Here you go

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=6753325773046944943

See where you rank in the mall ninja aptitude test.

Damn!! I'm only 28% Ninja!  ;D

I was so hoping for 50% I've been working so hard..... ::)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: BAC on March 16, 2011, 09:18:33 AM
Here you go

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=6753325773046944943

See where you rank in the mall ninja aptitude test.

Damn!! I'm only 28% Ninja!  ;D

I was so hoping for 50% I've been working so hard..... ::)

17% mall ninja.  Is that good or bad?

I'd like to point out that the person who wrote the test only scored 17% on spelling and grammar.   ;)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Hazcat on March 16, 2011, 09:34:03 AM
22%
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: JC5123 on March 16, 2011, 09:37:20 AM
The available answers seem kinda rigged to me.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: BAC on March 16, 2011, 09:40:58 AM
The available answers seem kinda rigged to me.

That's why I didn't answer a couple...no good choice for me amongst the available options.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: tt11758 on March 16, 2011, 10:15:16 AM
Here you go

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=6753325773046944943

See where you rank in the mall ninja aptitude test.

Damn!! I'm only 28% Ninja!  ;D

I was so hoping for 50% I've been working so hard..... ::)


Apparently I've been working harder than you.  I made it to 64%!!  LOL
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: JC5123 on March 16, 2011, 10:25:52 AM
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_n5hRErqZMso/TSykuO_pveI/AAAAAAAAANY/g2GbayxpNg8/s1600/o8bj2poei1.jpg)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: BAC on March 16, 2011, 11:17:27 AM
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_n5hRErqZMso/TSykuO_pveI/AAAAAAAAANY/g2GbayxpNg8/s1600/o8bj2poei1.jpg)

Wasn't that in a movie with Arienne Barbeau?
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: kmitch200 on March 16, 2011, 11:25:22 AM
Wasn't that in a movie with Arienne Barbeau?

Creepshow!

Gecko was truly entertaining. I missed him here but love to read the links to the online archives when I really need a laugh.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: BAC on March 16, 2011, 11:41:47 AM
Creepshow!

Gecko was truly entertaining. I missed him here but love to read the links to the online archives when I really need a laugh.

I was thinking Swamp Thing, but Creepshow works!
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: tombogan03884 on March 16, 2011, 11:51:29 AM
31% I have to agree with JC, some of the questions leave no good answer.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: PegLeg45 on March 16, 2011, 02:23:04 PM
36%....and I can't believe I went all the way through the thing.   ::)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: JC5123 on March 16, 2011, 02:24:23 PM
I am sooooooo gonna get my a$$ kicked for that aren't I?   :-\
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Big Frank on March 16, 2011, 05:21:29 PM
41%.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: ellis4538 on March 16, 2011, 06:05:19 PM
50% but I lied a lot...LOL


Richard
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Big Frank on March 16, 2011, 07:40:03 PM
I answered the way I thought a mall ninja would and got 73%. That's higher than 95% of my peers.  8)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: kmitch200 on March 16, 2011, 08:45:28 PM
I was thinking Swamp Thing, but Creepshow works!

(slaps forehead)  Duh! 

I gotta 'scuse though. I never made it through the whole movie!
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Hazcat on March 16, 2011, 09:17:36 PM
I guess I have NO aptitude for being a 'mall ninja'.  I TRIED to score high and got a 62.  So I went back and tweaked it and my score went DOWN!
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: bjtraz on March 16, 2011, 10:16:39 PM
Scored 22%, and then went back and tried to score and only score 67%. I'm a FAILURE!!!


Brian
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: mkm on March 16, 2011, 10:30:02 PM
34% being as honest as I could given the answer choices.  74% attempting mall ninja perfection.

Maybe my ninja ranking would go up if I could get my hands on "a combination AK 57 oozie radar laser triple-barrel double-scoped heat-seekin shotgun."

(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_n5hRErqZMso/TSykuO_pveI/AAAAAAAAANY/g2GbayxpNg8/s1600/o8bj2poei1.jpg)

There's a store here in town that actually has surplus ghillie suits for $120.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: tombogan03884 on March 16, 2011, 10:36:23 PM
Cabela's, Sportsman's guide, and Cheaper Than Dirt all sell ghillie suits. A lot of Bow hunters use them.

Trying for low score, skipped loaded questions  I got it down to 17%
Trying for high score lying outrageously  ;D  76%
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: kmitch200 on March 17, 2011, 12:51:08 AM
Answering all the questions honestly 29%

Continual tweaking of the responses, you know, like, Ninja style 79%!
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: sledgemeister on March 17, 2011, 02:41:02 AM
Hey whats wrong with being a Mall Ninja?
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: philw on March 17, 2011, 06:01:20 AM
Hey whats wrong with being a Mall Ninja?

hahaha  8)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Hazcat on March 17, 2011, 07:14:58 AM
Hey whats wrong with being a Mall Ninja?

Nope, doesn't count when wearing a plaid work shirt.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: usmcdadx2 on March 17, 2011, 08:41:48 AM
Thanks for posting this, this was a fun read. I've seen some of these clowns on other forums but I’m suprised one even tried to survive here.

Made myself pick answers for the loaded questions and still only scored 28%. Went back and tried to be the perfect MN and only made it to 80%. Damn, I've been in the security field for 30+ years...I know I should be a whole lot more "ninja" than that. Our local mall has a knife/sword/airsoft store, I love to wander past it anytime I'm out there so I can see the MN types in all their glory. The best part is it is right near a Starbucks and a Cinnebon so every now and then you get to see a herd of these "hardened warriors" swapping stories over a vente latte and giant cinnamon roll. The juxtaposition of all of that tactical dress and daring do with the frofoo coffee and bun always make me laugh out loud.

The sad thing is over the years I've been to training with some clueless twits that actually do work in the security field who are almost as much legends in their own minds as these guys...scary, very, very scary.
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: sledgemeister on March 17, 2011, 08:56:36 AM
Nope, doesn't count when wearing a plaid work shirt.

Was under cover, had a black tee shirt underneath!  ;)
Title: Re: The origin of the Mall Ninja
Post by: Hazcat on March 17, 2011, 10:22:36 AM
Was under cover, had a black tee shirt underneath!  ;)

HOLY CRAP!  An undercover mall ninja!  Ya got me there, Sledge! (see how well it worked!)

;D