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Author Topic: Classic joke thread...  (Read 1398501 times)

TAB

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5940 on: November 15, 2024, 08:38:49 AM »
What does a burnt pizza, a pregnant women and a frozen beer all have in common?


Some one didn't pull out in time.
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I always break all the clay pigeons,  some times its even with lead.

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5941 on: November 16, 2024, 07:56:18 AM »
 :)
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

TAB

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5942 on: November 17, 2024, 07:58:29 AM »
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I always break all the clay pigeons,  some times its even with lead.

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5943 on: November 24, 2024, 11:34:49 PM »
They know that Santa's on his way
He's loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh
And every mother's child is gonna spy
To see if reinpork really know how to fly!

 ;D ;D ;D ;D
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5944 on: November 27, 2024, 12:44:20 PM »
I remember a cartoon called Squiddly Diddly that was on when I was a little kid. It ran from 1965-1966. Back then I didn't think it was anything but an innocent kids cartoon. But now I think Squiddly Diddly sounds like the name of a Japanese tentacle porn movie. Thanks internet for ruining another memory from my childhood. :(

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Squiddly_Diddly

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tentacle_erotica
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5945 on: Today at 12:27:49 PM »
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5945 on: November 30, 2024, 04:30:44 AM »
 ;D
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

alfsauve

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5946 on: December 02, 2024, 11:54:58 AM »
During Thanksgiving dinner at President Biden's house, Hunter bumped into his dad and said, "Pardon me."  The rest is history.
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Diamondback

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5947 on: Yesterday at 11:38:17 AM »
Something that'll give you a chuckle... one of my Lego collector groups has a Secret Santa every year. This year, the guy I got matched up with, his two things are building model trains from Lego bricks and Bible study - so I arranged for him to get references on the Chapel Car (basically a rail-mobile church; "Messenger of Peace" is the last of its kind) in a local railroad museum that he could design and build a model from.

He happens to find me a pistol case big enough for a 5" 1911 that's made to look like a Bible case... and tells me "now you can say you're Protected by a Higher Power and mean it in more ways than one."
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alfsauve

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5948 on: Yesterday at 09:32:47 PM »
My friend Marty took a seasonal job in a backery.  He hates the job and wants to quit, but he needs the dough.
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